It reassured me someone went through the same things I did, that I wasn’t alone in my torture. I told him, “I won’t come to any different conclusion.
But even through the music, I could feel things starting to fall apart.
I order his food (one Belgium waffle on the soft side, a plate of crispy bacon) and he orders mine (a short stack, no butter, a bowl of fruit, a side of extra crispy bacon). And the casual friendship-with-benefits morphed into a caring, loving relationship. They didn’t know what was going on; all they knew was my seemingly unnecessary depression.
We sit, together in our love, relishing every second. You would think after three years of dating a married man, I would be used to this. I could see the aurora dancing in his eyes when he saw me, and he could see the sparkle in mine. I didn’t expect to miss him when we weren’t together, I didn’t expect to become so attached to his children that they felt like family, and I definitely didn’t expect to fall in love. What I thought could be something simple ended up being a stressor. Our time together was constantly cut short so his wife wouldn’t find out. I trudged back and forth to work amid discussions of counseling, tentative hugs and attempts at forcing me to eat. The only thing worse than bearing that heavy a weight alone is carrying it yourself.
My dearest, the clear unquaried blue Of those depths is all but blinding.
But the crocus is up, and the lark, and the blundering Blood knows what it knows.
Anti-Love Song Lyrics: "Holding Her and Loving You" tells the story of a man who is married, but in love with another woman.
He still loves his wife, and won't just leave her, but he walks the fine line of holding his wife while wishing he was with his lover.
She was married and people could get hurt — not least her eight-year-old son, Jake. We made each other feel special, and it was as though I’d been waiting for someone like her all my life.
But I soon found I couldn’t just call or email her when I wanted to. But I did want to go public, meet her parents, her friends, her son. Even so, when it was her turn to pay, she would do so in cash so as not to leave a paper trail.